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All this news come directly from the Government of the Kazantip Republic
WE ARE NOT KAZANTIP.COM WE ARE KAZANTIP-UKRAINE.COM
Kazantip Republic and Big Travel Industry
Though being a nonexistent state, the Kazantip Republic is getting more and more popular tourist destination throughout the world. And how! What could be more exotic than trips to a nonexistent country? Anyway, the Government of the Kazantip Republic has decided the time has come to settle relations with tour operators providing trips to Kazantip.
In the nearest future, there will be launched online registration for travel-agencies of which we (together with the Great Nation) will choose the most worthy candidates from different counties and invest them with Official Partner status. The others, hacks and cheats that don't meet the high demands will make the blacklist.
Currently, we're ready to introduce you with the first one – a French/Ukrainian travel company “Kazantip Ukraine”.
Among its benefits are:
• an international license
• rep offices in Ukraine, France, Germany, UK, Italy
• package all-inclusive tours at humane prices (flights + transfers + visa support + accommodation + food + alcohol)
• charter flights Paris-Simferopol
• student bus-trips Paris-Simferopol
• two good French restaurants in Kazantip this summer.
All necessary information about offers can be found on websites of the agency
• http://kazantip-ukraine.fr site in French
• http://kazantip-ukraine.com/ site in English
• http://kazantipa-ukraine.de site in German
• http://kazantip-ukraina.ru/ site in Russian
• http://kazantip-ucraina.com site in Italian
We remind all international visitors -- please avoid dealing with unauthorized and unlicensed by the Kazantip Republic companies, especially with kazantip.com.
Customers of this agency will most likely have difficulties with Kazantip visa applications.
Department for Worldwide Development presents: CONSULATES
The Kazantip Republic would like to inform all interested persons and organizations of innovation in Kazantip diplomatic practice.
First off, the term “embassy” along with many “embassies” has been abolished. Instead, the new Department for Worldwide Development and directly accountable to it consulates are being put together now.
The Kazantip Consulate is the same old long hand of the Republic, friendly extended to the world; however, a skilful one and obeying the brain's commands -- not acting in the land-grabbing interests on its own authority.
The consulate, whose field of activity covers the whole region or country, performs the strictly defined functions under the 12-month agreement that can be extended following the results of this period and re-attestation.
To become a consul you need to pass a rather serious interview to convince us that you are able to manage such a mission in a professional manner.
Person or group running events under the aegis of the Republic illegally, without special sanction will be subject to legal prosecution.
Start the process of application for the status of the Kazantip Consulate here
Kazantip Republic. How we won Ibiza
Between 24th-29th May, Ibiza hosted the 4th International Music Summit where the Republic was taking part as a speaker. KAZANTIP IS NOT WHAT YOU THINK was the subject of our talk, because, first off, we meant to explain plainly that “Kazantip is a Republicl”.During the performance, the reps of the Republic’s honor, minister of music culture, Yura Marichev, and of propaganda, Adrew Goshva showed the music elite a popular-science film on the subject that we had prepared especially for the Summit and other works of the national movie studio.
With their performance, they did not just let the world public know “what it is dealing with” – not just some event, but a great power, whose might (and the force of imagination) is incontestable; they taught it a little lesson – how and where to dance to be successful.
President Nikita Marshunok, who had been announced among the speakers, was not able to attend the Summit in person, which didn’t hurt him to hit it big with one-minute video-address that you can acquaint yourself with here
Having explained all our ruhles, we never gave the Summit audience an unambiguous answer to “Whatever is Kazantip?”; we just afforded everyone the opportunity to work out this deeply personal issue on their own. And yet, the result of our perfomance was really striking.
The audience rose in prolonged applause. During the questions-answers process, the leaders of public opinion were grabbing the mic just to say that “after THIS, all other performances and projects look and sound SILLY.” For yet more two hours, the ministers were answering the question “how to play at Kazantip?!” As a result, we opened up important partnerships with different countries; and the world public concurred that “there are only three unique and noteworthy projects on the planet: Burning Man, Glastonbury and Kazantip." By the way, the Burning Man reps will pay an official visit to the Republic this year.
It is safe to say that we did not just win Ibiza; we came much closer to world supremacy. Which, as you remember, we’re going to achieve through peaceful means, gathering all the brightest, smartest and most talented people of the planet. We plan to accomplish that to the 20th anniversary of the Republic )
Film for IMS
President’s Speech
Kazantip Republic @ International Music Summit
We'd like to inform those who don’t follow world music culture events and are out of the picture: one of the main events, the International Music Summit, is taking place in Ibiza between 24th-29th May. And it’s not just taking place, along with the coolest parties from Carl Cox to David Lynch, it will feature performances from the Kazantip Republic’s speakers: the minister of music culture, Yury Marychev, the minister of propaganda, Andriy Hoshva and The President of the Republic Nikita Marshunok.
And know what? They will be the first speakers from the CIS countries in the history of IMS. Mr. President, as always, was very original and his speech will be presented in a pretty specific form, that we're going to observe later. Also, especially for the Summit, Nikola Frantsevich Movie Studio prepared a film-report "KAZANTIP IS NOT WHAT YOU THINK". The exclusive showing of this film will be held simultaneously with the performance of our speakers on 27th May, here
GOVERNMENT STATEMENT ON KAZANTIP.COM
In light of growing internationalization of the Kazantip Republic and on the ground that incidents of fraud among the companies dealing with international guests have become more frequent, the government has decided to examine the list of tour operators carefully. The KAZANTIP Gmbh tour-agency aka kazantip.com has always been, and remains the number-of-complains leader.
We would like to bring to your notice that this tour agency has nothing to do with the Kazantip Republic and when you buy a tour, you risk being left without Kazantip visa for some reason or other. At this date, the company is misinforming its customers about the visa registration process.
The government of the Kazantip Republic has ended co-operation with this tour-agency considering numerous complains from European clients about the activities of this company and sex-tourism propaganda. Roland Stach и Sergej Litvinovskiy, employees of this company, have been officially declared “persona non grata”.
The Kazantip Gmbh tour-agency and its clients will be refused the Kazantip visa.
We would strongly recommend all international tourists avoid buying tours on the following web sites:
kazantip.com
kazantip.de
kazantip.fr
kazantip.it
kazantip.be
kazantip.ru
kazantipfestival.com
In the nearest time, we’re going to make out a list of recommended tour operators and also a black list. Both will be available for your information.
The government of the Kazantip Republic
KAZANTIP.COM STRIKES BACK: THE FIRST THREATS
Oh, this is it, the first - ridiculous, but pretty serious ;) - threats from Roland Stach.
We hope, it's just a beginning and continuation of thе saga is gonna be even funnier:
«However if you decide to release the statement regarding kazantip.com then you have to expect the following consequences:
The kaZantip GmbH will inform all its previous and existing guests via email, on all web sites and social network groups and press releases
about the propagated hatred against foreigners through the web site kazantipa.net and especially by their so called PreZident N1 aka Nikita I.
The kaZantip GmbH will inform in the same way about the bad local infrastructure in Popovka, the lack of water or electricity in almost any accommodations,
the selling of harming plant fertilizer as drugs approved by the organizers, every year increasing dead bodies at the event, the missing of any first aid
ass well about the thieves and gangs focused in robbing foreigners.»
Poor man, he is forced to sell his tours to such a godforsaken place.. Though we do remember, some time ago he considered Kazantip as Heaven on Earth.
Seems, it depends on what you are selling right now. Seems, Roland is not about to sell anything anymore.)
Well, tel us MORE, man :)
JESUS is BACK. (Special Review by the Kazantip Republic)
Not indifferent to matters of Faith, the government of the Kazantip Republic has recently made a statement upon as important for humanity event as the coming of Christ II, planned by religious organizations all over the world for may 21, 2001.
As you know, the official Kazantip religion is a belief in the reality of miracles, so we’re not just OK with such Christian plot like “Jesus is back – II”, we’re waiting for this wonderful appearance with a profound interest. Though our experience tells us that sequels are traditionally weaker than the first part: even if technological progress and budget allow impressive special effects, the ideological part tend to fall short. As followers of another religion, we don’t quite understand the meaning of this happening – whether Jesus is coming to Earth to make the Apocalypse or to sacrifice himself for humanity a second time…? However, on this occasion, we’d advice the second coming organizing committee to give it a second thought. Even believing in miracles, we’re unwilling to idealize humanity and wouldn’t recommend you, guys, squander valuable assets for the sake of illusionary salvation. Humanity is beyond reclaim and the crucifixion of prophets is (and has always been) just a show, an entertainment without any enlightening function. You’d better give humanity a chance to peacefully degrade on and it will die out on its own near TV-sets, without any Apocalypse. If our recommendations are accepted and no Apocalypse/Coming happens on may, 21st, well… it’s gonna be a real Miracle.)
Remembering previous Apocalypses
Visa Online. Freedom for Visa Department Windows
The government of the Kazantip Republic has been always paying a very close heed to the wishes of the nation and taken into consideration the most commonsensible of them. As a part of the fulfillment of the national wishes like
1) less come-and-go people
2) less queues at Visa Department
From Z’19 season (2011) onwards, online pre-registration will work instead of the regular procedure of registration on arrival.
The operating principle is this:
You submit your personal data, email and a color passport-like photo in digital format, taken in any photo-studio by any professional photographer. Your form passes through the moderation process (for compliance with our technical terms) and you receive email notification of your application status. If your application is approved, you will get your visa fast and queue-free after paying cash at Visa Department on your arrival in the Republic.
We are currently working on an online payment system that is going to be optional i.e. you could pay a visa online or on your arrival, at will. We will inform you of the work progress additionally.
IMPORTANT. Citizens, who didn’t pre-register on the website, can’t buy a visa on arrival in the Republic. You can register online here
FOR MEDIA ATTENTION. Accreditation Process.
The Propaganda Ministry of the Kazantip Republic is bringing to the notice of all media interested in cooperation:
we are starting the process of media accreditation for the Project 2011 from launching the Mediaroom on our official website.
The Mediaroom is a device that enables registered members of the media to get all the necessary information,
send your activity reports and leave comments in real time in a single virtual office on the website of the Republic.
The accreditation decision will be made solely based on these activity reports. For more detailed information,
please visit the Mediaroom. See you there and thanks for your participation!
For the international press attention: even though the Mediaroom will initially be available in English,
please contact Global Pablicity - our official partner in the UK - with partnership and cooperation queries or questions:
Nikki Wright-McNeill - nikki[at]globalpublicity.co.uk
Clare Dover - clare[at]globalpublicity.co.uk
Andrii Goshva - goshva[at]me.com
The Propaganda Ministry of the Kazantip Republic.
President’s annual appeal to the Princesses
There is an immense amount of gossip going around kazantipian Princesses. Even that I’m engaged in selling them in organs to black transplantology.
I’m ready to confirm many of them, but I will never agree that it’s just yet another beauty contest.
Right, beauty is power and, it must be confessed, we tried pragmatically to find use for it in a national economy.
Perhaps, because of this sanatorium-resort holidays the princesses took on the savour of animators I’ve also got a felling that some princesses got a bit pissed of over recent years and need to have a rest.
I want to expose the new fresh, slim “pink” leaders, willing to make (which is all the go) innovations.
My suggestion is to leave only the best traditions and, what is more important, to have a good look through your image built by some foreign TV channels. Let’s, for one thing, stick their camera lenses up their ass. And then, let’s kick in the balls every euro-jerkoff, sent over here by kazantip.com degenerates as to a “sex-tourist Mecca”. From now on, any Princess has the right to smash over the head of any fucker a bottle of Hennessy, Moet&Chandon, Olmeca (at his expense) and to leave him with no visa, if he allows himself a touch or disrespect toward Her Royal Highness.
Remember, “you’re the princesses of Kazantip, not something of fucking shit”
Now go and assert yourself, show your teeth, kill a thousand rivals, pension off all the stale princesses… We're monitoring closely, how you prove your worth to the honorable piece of pink plastic, sonorous title of “The Chosen Hundred” and a crown.
N I
ANTHEM CONTEST. Round 2
There is no such thing as a world record in Some Town Day Run for amateur sportsmen; but there are always winners anyhow. In the same manner, a group of so called leaders has been
set up in our Anthem-Writer Marathon. They are 15 in all, but, believe us, they are the best of 3362.
Let us warn you straightaway, there are no masterpieces or anthems in the unconditional sense of the word.
But when you give it a try, you may distinguish some nuts and bolts of music ideas that we will
possibly undertake to tune up, together with authors.
The second round long list:
1. ΛTLΛNTIS OCΣAN
2. KAFFEIN
3. Lutay Ilya
4. Dirty Boys project
5. Elgans
6. R-Tem
7. Demidov
8. Playone
9. Sergey Tkachev
10. FEERNANO
11. Aerofeel5
12. Sound V-Touch
13. MAYS
14. Stylus
15. Re-Zone
NB: To avoid prejudice, the voting will be anonymous – without mentioning authors’ names and titles of works.
Live on Mars
Aug 14-18, 2011. Kazantip Republic, Faberge
Answering the eternal question – IS THERE LIFE ON MARS, the Kazantip Republic is intent on demonstrating the presence of this very life in one week of august, gathering the best live bands at Faberge dancefloor. The whole idea is to give a try for the musicians who don’t skulk behind state of the art technologies, but exploit them ably, realizing that nothing is better than to modulate the listeners’ emotions live.
The Organizing Committee of “Live on Mars” is interested in bands, duos, pop groups from all over the globe providing that they are aware of music harmony, sound derivation, synthesis and, what is more important, understand how to join all this elements and make them into a whole. People with analogue heart. Besides, VJs and video artists are also being invited to take part in the project for random/nonramdon collaboration with live bands.
As such, The Organizing Committee of “Live on Mars” accepts applications from bands interested in this experiment.
An application must include:
1. Live videos of concerts (or rehearsals, as a last resort) – necessarily
2. Web links – official website/MySpace/Last.fm/You Tube.
3. Technical rider.
4. Band’s home station.
5. Short bio.
VJs must submit:
1. Portfolio
2. Videos of concerts with your works.
3. Technical rider
The main requirement is qualitative and beautiful music. Not necessarily with drums or guitar – it may be simple synthesizers or just voice (like Dub FX), but it also must be interesting in a visual way – how the band looks on stage.
Having critically analyzed your abilities, send your requests here: Artem Harchenko, Minister of Lives - snoochiboochi [at] gmail.com
The Kazantip Republic z19. National Anthem Contest
"It just so happens that the theme of summer past
became this melody for every buddy of us,
we were crooning it along from dawn till dusk,
we were drinking wine, we were smoking butts
in the sea of lights, in the sea of sounds
and just in the sea of bright blue colors.
Nothing more than five notes, no chorus, no verse
But you gotta listen how the melody goes…"
© Tequilajuzz "The Theme Of Summer Past"
It just so happens that way back in the faraway nineties, it was exactly the Kazantip Republic what inspired a rock band called Tequilajuzz to write these heartfelt lines. And definitely, some particularly special melody that became the theme of the very same Kazantipian summer. That in turn had been written by the author with inspiration from something. Indeed, inspiration is a chain reaction somehow…
In search of yet another inspiring melody for the forthcoming summer, the Kazantip Republic announces the New National Anthem Contest. And as you know from the Constitution, any piece of music able to give a listener goose bumps can became the one.
The contest will be conducted in two phases.
Phase 1: Feb 1st – Mar 1st, at http://promodj.com
Phase 2. Mar 1st – Apr 1st, at http://kazantip-republic.com
Learn more about Conditions and stuff
To check out the compositions that were the anthems of prior years
Media Black Magic. How “Gone with the wind” turns into "Vodka, sun and sex at Europe's biggest event"
There are two types of creative people. Those who are able to make something conceptual even from something of shit, assign a meaning to it and reveal its inner beauty. And those who have a genius for making even the most beautiful idea crude and hackneyed, on the theoretical grounds that their audience is too dull and moronic to receive anything if it’s not hooked on scandal/sex or other highly liquid crap. We’ve never believed in sponsors, big politics and media that are particularly good at doing such things. But we can’t deny there’s something magical about that – the shoddiest, the most low-rent tricks give the highest ratings.
Think, for instance, of CNN.
Below: the president’s interview given to CNN and CNN editorial made of this interview along with the information from this site. (Not for nothing didn’t the wise president want to give this interview…)
We are a very romantic government, we believe in miracles and street magic ourselves, and still we can’t get it – how the hell do they do that? How is the interview “Gone With The Wind” being turned into “Vodka, Sun, Sex And Stuff Like That”? How on earth from “nothing but praise” comment of Timo Maas, who had been playing for 4 hours instead of 2 and asked for invite to the next year, does come “anarchic shit”? It’s pure and simple black magic… ;]
Let’s go make some new tags: ‘sex’, ‘vodka’ and ‘media black magic’ ;]
PS: With this article about how a good news item becomes a bad one, we show you an example of backward, white magic – how to make from a bad news item a good one.
“Kazantip, I love you!” shorts
 By the way, we are not the only ones who fond of Kazantip as a film set. Armin Van Buuren made his “Gaia – Tuvan” music video here. BT’s “The Emergency” was shot partly in Kazantip and wholly in Crimea. Serge Devant was also inspired a lot making his Z-dj-set documentary… We don’t know, if these videos transmit the real, aura of Kazantip, ‘ cause you can imagine what DJ’s/directors could see from their dj-places — just a sea of light, sea of sound, sea of people… But they still portray Kazantip as something very epic and tremendous… Like a huge open-air club, for example :] And – it’s obvious – they are in love with that ‘club’. So let it be.]
Well, let’s see these a-la “Kazantip, I love you!” short-but-hot love letters from summers past.
[Gaia - Tuvan]
[BT - The Emergency]
[Serge Devant @Kazantip 2010, KLF - 3 AM eternal]
President’s New Year Address to the Great Nation
Unlike other presidents who use TV-magic on New Year’s night to remind everyone what they’ve done for their countries in the outgoing year and to promise what they’re gonna do in the next one, our Z-President doesn’t allow himself to drift into any boring officialism in his festive speech. Usually he begs pardon for his hard nature or thanks the Great Nation for their loyalty and crazyness, or makes a declaration of love — with dances, singing, dramatic entrance, gags, strip-show and so on…;] Shortly, he goes out of his presidential image and dares to reveal his extra terrestrial, human, personal essence. However, he never promises anything, ’cause promises must be fulfilled. And who needs all these hollow words if you can do something real right now? Like saying “I love you”, for one. Sometimes it requires no less efforts than rescuing somebody, but at last it’s absolutely free. And makes everyone absolutely happy. Isn’t it magic, Mr. Blane? ;]
So, in that epic New Year’s speech our honest Mr. President will tell you what he would do if he were not just a human, but a fictional superpowered being. (But since he is not — alas — he will never do it!) And the most fantastic part of that already magic statement is: it’s a RAP! We do promise, you’ll be amazed. As befits Christmas Eve.]
Well… All rise, the Prez is rappin’! ;]
BLIZZARD
“Everybody knows what it is – Kazantip in summer.
Thousands know what the Z Maydays are.
And only the most daring ones — right there,
yearly … ring in the New Year.”
Among the other odd Kazantipian traditions, there is one and only — the most outlandish — tradition of celebrating New Year at the snow-covered, desert beach of Republic. Despite relatively southern location of the Crimean steppes, winter is not a very romantic time there – aggressive sea, oppressive grayness, howling winds…In short, depressive wasteland. However, there are (thanks God, just a few!) great people, as brave as polar explorers, who sacrifice the comfort and warmth of hearth for returning to the cold and lonely homeland of their hearts – the Kazantip Republic. To be honest, we can’t even imagine how crazy you have to be to love your republic to do this… ;] So “praised be the daring of all bold dreamers!” With a movie. And ‘BLIZZARD’, President’s blessing to the kazantipian “polar explorers”, is trying to add a bit of summer sun and fun into your winter homesickness ;]
So, let's keep trippin'?
Bubbles
This short movie is a documentary describing the Kazantipian tradition of launching ‘wish baloons’ at sunset. It’s a kind of childish, touching, sweeeeeeet spectacle that can melt the most iced hearts, you know…)
But it also has some metaphorical — and rather severe – sense:
You have to be very advanced to understand that most of your burning desires are illusions. And just very few of them are destined to be realized. But as long as you feel these desires, they seem to you really beautiful and — in a certain sense — they ARE beautiful. They fill the space of your life, the space of your heart, they shine in your eyes, and if you are lucky, s trong and persistent enough, probably some of your wishes — the innermost ones — will touch the heaven.
So be it.
Xmas Music Policy
Indeed “Christmas is all around” and precisely like in Christmas movie “Love actually”, it magically affects even the politicians. And their music policy ;] After appearing on the Rolling Stone’s cover, the rising rock-star American President Barack Obama went even more far and appointed Jon Bon Jovi to White House position. The minister of rock’n'roll or somewhat. Former and future Russian President Vladimir Putin sung ‘Blueberry Hill’ (with the orchestra) to Sharon Stone and Kurt Russell just a couple of days ago. (and must say, it’s horrible!)
No wonder after all, that our freaky ruler - Nikita I of Kazantip has started to rap. He even rapped the whole “New Year Address to the Great Nation”, imagine this? And now we’re shooting the official video for that, um, song, which is gonna be released on Christmas Eve. Stay tuned, ’cause it’s something. Something magical ;]
” If only I were Santa Clause,
sucks, I would cancel the frost
um… well, I would leave a little
for penguins or snowboarders,
and I’d grace snow girls with roses….”
[to be continued]
Here is the audio teaser (in Russian)
And here (you even may rate it)
Homeland for sale
This section is meant for people who have always been more interested to "do something on my own" than to "watch the others doing" and who, for some reason, are not interested to do what the others do in Kazantip (to drink, to dance and to sunbathe), but interested to do what just some crazy people do around here i.e. their own business with a view on the sea.
To become the Kazantipian business elite you need to carry good ideas, clear head, strong nerves and to know the game rules:
- We do not play with people who have never been to Kazantip.
- We do not play with people for their last money.
In all other respects, everything is simple: you choose on the map a free lot that you like and make your proposal.
Due to the specific nature of Kazantipian business, we play this game just in Russian as yet. But in principle, as the experience of dance flour Heaven and its owner Benjamen Kassan shows, nothing is impossible.
The Homeland Auction is open
Kazantip International
As you know, the Kazantip republic is a multi-ethnical state where music, dances and emotions are used as universal languages, which allows the Great Nation to understand one another. And yet, we didn’t have certainty that the rest of the world did perceive and comprehend us adequately. The last episode with giving Ibiza DJ Award for the best international music even tto the Kazantip Republic was a real confirmation of that.
Given that now more than ever, the program for achieving the world supremacy through peaceful means is our highest priority and there is no better peaceful means then to make it fall in love with us, we’re going to flirt with the world in popular languages (except Chinese). The history, the constitution and the elements of the kazantipish social science in English, German and French. On the brand new international website of the Republic.
You're welcome.
Willkommen.
Soyes le bienvenu.
Amendments to the Kazantip Constitution
In view of the Kazantip Republic’s entrance into the international arena and its increased popularity among tourists from all over the world, the Government of the republic would like to draw the attention of the foreign guests and the Great Nation to the Amendments to the Kazantip Constitution.
The two new articles of the Criminal Code - on incitement of ethnic hatred and Sexual harassment - are meant to regulate gender and interethnic relations of the cosmopolitan crowd spending holidays in the Republic. For the avoidance of confusion and misconception, we recommend all of you get acquainted with the new masterpieces of lawmaking. For as you know, "ignorance of the law does not excuse" and “who didn’t read our constitution… so much the worse for them”
Yo!
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![Well… All rise, the Prez is rappin’! ;]](http://kazantip-republic.com/video/#vid44.jpg){kind=link}
